We feel alone in certain circumstances and situations that are learned. Because, if we really look in a mirror and observe our surroundings, we will realize that, in reality, we are not alone.
Every time we feel alone, a vacuum takes hold of us. We are afraid of not having anyone by our side. This makes us act in certain ways that, instead of solving this situation, aggravate it. Therefore, today we are going to discover 4 reasons that explain why this happens.
1. We feel alone because we do not have a partner
Not having a partner seems to be essential in the society in which we live. This situation causes others to tell you that you have to go out more, that you have to fix yourself more … In short, they give you advice so that you can solve your “singleness”.
But what if you do not want to have a partner inside? Is it necessary to feel alone for this? The truth is that being single should not make you feel alone.
If so, it is because the beliefs that “without a partner I am nothing”, “I am having rice” or “I will be alone all my life” are acting on you.
Feeling alone for not having a partner leads us to depend on someone to be happy. This is going to make us very unhappy, since we have to learn to be well and at peace without anyone at our side. Our happiness does not depend on other people.
2. We do not follow the path of others
This is quite linked to the above and is that, when we do not follow the established path, when we do not want to have a partner but most of our friends have it, we feel alone. Although, more than alone, we feel lacking in support and misunderstood .
Not following the same path as others makes us feel alone. However, we are not. Confidence in ourselves, as well as increasing self-esteem and security, will be indispensable conditions to feel good.
Our life is a blank paper . It does not matter that we were born in a culture and society where most people act or follow a certain path. We have to live the life we want, the one that will make us happy, even if it does not correspond to the one that others usually choose.
3. Friends who have a partner disappear
What usually happens when a friend becomes a partner? Well, it usually disappears and leave your friends aside. Until you break the relationship with that person, you can rarely stay. This situation happens more frequently than we would like.
To carry this in the best way, especially if we have very few friends, we should encourage ourselves to do what we do with friends, but without them. We can go have a coffee alone! We can go to the movies alone! We do not have to feel alone. We have the best company: us.
Many times, society conditions us to carry out various activities with other people . However, we can also enjoy them with no one but our own company. This will allow us to know better and learn to enjoy life without depending on others.
4. We try not to cover our shortcomings
When we feel alone for some of the reasons above, we will most likely seek to be with others because we have some kind of lack. For example, if our parents did not give us affection, we will lack those caresses and that love.
Therefore, in adult life, we will have a lack of affection that we will try to overcome by being with people who give it to us. But, if they leave our lives, we will feel alone again. Therefore, it does not work.
When we feel alone because we want others to cover parts of us that we are not able to fill, it is important to do some work to increase self-esteem.
It is necessary to go to a professional who helps us to know what things fill us and to guide us so that we can give ourselves all that love or affection that we have lacked. In this way, we will never have to look for it in others.
Understanding all this to avoid feeling alone is a long process until it is taken to action. However, it is the only way for us to be truly happy without depending and without tying ourselves to anyone.